Isn't She Beautiful?

That is Mount Prau. The best mount I ever climbed cause I never climb any other mount before. For a beginner 4 hours hiking to reach the high was a something great. Did not fall into the cliff was a gratitude. Really proud of myself and promise not to climb it again. It was so exhausted yet fun.

 

A Sadness Will Always Be A Sadness

When I get sad, all I want to do is become more sad. I pitying myself, I cried for myself. Listening sad song repeatedly, and forcing myself to be more even sadder. I like being in a sorrow that I made by and for my only own self. It isn't pathetic I guess. Cause the only way I could enjoy my life is when I'm sad and when I'm alone. Everyone has their own way to enjoy the life, right? Even me.

Sometimes I imagine myself dying. Buried in the ground. Seeing nothing, just dark. And lonely. Would people miss me? Would they going to cry over me? Or even they would forgetting me? Or perhaps they would happy? I always wonder it.

I used to listen Sia Furler's song, My Love. It always got me, I love being blue.

Hari Ini Sangat Sibuk

I've run a blood-glucose-diet since about 3 years ago. I don't allowed to eat junk foods, instant noodle, soda, and seasonal fruit, don't have idea why seasonal fruits. Those are mango, jackfruit, mangosteen and so much more. But I thought it because some seasonal fruits are plant chemically, or perhaps the sugar level on seasonal fruits are quite high. Entahlah never do research on it before. I did it, seriously. But sometimes on cheating day I eat junk food and instant noodle. I ate mango yesterday, I can't deny. It was sooo gooood and sweet. That's my guilty pleasure, I won't eat it for at least few months later then.

I should have been so busy and hectic doing my home tasks for exam next Thursday. There are so much tasks that want me to finish, but I got no idea where to start. So... I did DIY to refresh my mind. Then I made a bracelet. It's pink with black pendants.

Dah Akuh Mah Apah Atuh

I was watching tv when mum ask me for a talk. She randomly said that "I prefer to comment on photos than a loooong wisdom words that written by my friends on facebook." while she scrolling on her screen phone, I sure she just checking up her facebook home. And I asked her, "Why mum? I thought that people at your age are more interested at that kind of wisdom words, that very long and boring, mmm mainly for people on my age." "Not really for me. Mmm the actual reason is simply, cause I'm too lazy to read it all." Oh well, I expected she would replied my question diplomatically.

Yes, at some point I merely same like her. Sometimes I found myself too lazy for reading, I would feel sleepy and for often yawning. I did double tap a photo on instagram, yet I didn't read the caption finishly. And sometimes I post photos on my instagram without any caption or tagging name or place or song, blankly, just a photo. I don't write much, I don't like writting. And yea it's been so long I don't write status on my facebook or post something, even change my profile picture. I even dont write much on my blog for this year I only posted few. Yes, I'm overly lazy to complie the letters into words, words into sentences, then finally weaving it into paragraphs. My vocabulary is crappy also bad and messed up. Lol. Pardon me Lord, I'm only a human.

I oftenly found some photos mostly at instagram that having a lengthy caption but it doesn't match with the photo. Like they post a landscape photo but they write a song lyric on it caption box. Sometimes a super long sentence, sometimes just junk hashtags. They perhaps write it in purpose, to show their feelings or what but I still don't get it. People write for a long caption but it isn't fits with the photo, for what? It was actually like a poetry. Ah, I'm sorry, I don't mean to judge loh. For advice, why you not write it on a blog, dude? Dude Herlino (?). Sakjane yo terserah sih, kan gur ngomong wae. That's probably one of my why I don't really like to read the caption. The second is people write it with sophisticated words until I can hardly understand. My tutor once told me that he really sure I'm a smart (it only to make me no offended) but somehow I look stupid when talking. He was so harsh. He told me it because I do rarely reading, so I have lack of words. It makes me hard to explain what I want to talk. It's true. So I don"t feel offended. That's make me look stupid. But it's okay, I don't feel any burden cause this less-of-reading-things. For now at least.

A good photo without caption won't explain anything exactly, it would only give not leave you an impression, yes, just good cause the photo is indeed good visually but you don't know what is it and what story behind the photos. So please to write the caption properly, and probably shortly.

This writing is muchly explained that I was a person who only wants a delight for her self. Komentar tapi sendirinya lupa apa yang telah ia lakukan hanyalah sama dengan yang orang lain lakukan. Manusia, ada lupa dan khilafnya.

Yesterday, I took a walk with my bf. We went Solo by a morning train, Joglo Express. A nice train, and it's a new cause the passenger seats still wrapped in plastic, clean and so comfort. But it was quite expensive for 45 minutes rail-trip. I should take pramex next time. Anyway this is his first time ever going to Solo by train, and it's my second time since for a long time ago. I'm so excited, we got lost. Actually he just accompanied me, cause I'm not that brave to catch the train alone.

Menjadi Mahasiswa Periklanan di Kampus yang Baru Saja Negeri

Ah... This week feels plenty heavy, very much take home tasks and aaaah.. praktikum produksi iklan tv dan radio harus bye maximal. I should inputting it again next year. Geez. I should be ready to see my first E* in cbis. It's okay, my parents won't ask me for a good ipk. Well, it's actually fun being an advertising student in my college. Kuliahnya shantay banget dan menurutku asik. Melihat anak jurnal dan PR yang tugas akhirnya tidak karuan banyaknya membuat memilih advertising sebagai konsentrasi adalah hal yang paling bijaksana yang pernah saya lakukan. Saking santainya, mau bikin tugas analisis iklan cetak dan televisi aja malah jadi bikin .gif kayak gini...

People Will Stay Okay As Long As They Do Sharing

I always thought that I am the most peculiar kind of human. I dont know. I spoke haltingly, it's sometimes bugging my own self, I look like a talking-fish. Then, I wonder why most people take my jokes seriously, seroiusly? I am a slow response type of person, at anything, although I know the answer is. I like to walk in high pace but not running, it's weird because my weight. I like to imagine things, even at a little and unnoticed and probably no one has thought about it. Like "why people can do anything for love, where their logic?" and "if doing suicide isn't a sin, would you do it? why?" and "Is living hypocritically would make you looked like a bad person? but it's needed sometimes" actually that what I think currently. And yes there are still a lot questions spinning around my head needing the answers. But I keep it all just in my head since no one could understand my words. I know they are not really interested with it cause it is not so cool topic to be talked, they mostly just love to talk and comment about other's life secret and sometimes people's ootd. Yeah. Which I love to talk about it too, hahaha.

Well. I only talk about my life things with my mom and sometimes my boyfriend. They both are a good listener so far about that kind of topic. Most is daily life activity. I sometimes just need a person who able listen to me, like yeah listen to me with no comment, no judge, just simply understand what I say. I usually having a bed time story with my mom, I always tell her about everything.What I have done during the day, what I ate at lunch time, even that what I saw during my way back home. It's random. And she sometimes share about her past story. I love my mom so much.

Today I met my boyfriend, he just back from Karimun Jawa after 10 days adventuring. I used to ask him to tell me his story. He told me about how people life there. There is no electricity in daylight, sleeping in a house which only 2 meters from the beach, a men who merried a ship (I will tell you when you ask, cause it's quite long story). a poor and cutie seasick dog lol, and a guy who swim across the sea to Karimun for only 2 hours without life jacket. God. And he still alive. I wonder how if there is a shark and bite him.

I could feel happy and good when I can share and listen. Ah yeah, you will keep it yourself okay as long as you want to listen while you talk. I dont know what's the point of my post but being a person who wants to listen is sometimes hard cause talking is easier than listening.